


Forever

by homoeroticmisogyny



Series: press f to pay respects [1]
Category: Homoerotic Misogyny (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, F/F, Friendship, High School, Murder, Parties, Prom, Élite (2018) AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-09
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 11:13:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29313129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/homoeroticmisogyny/pseuds/homoeroticmisogyny
Summary: It’s prom night at Atrox Academy, and emotions are high. When Lucy makes a grave mistake, Dieke helps her navigate the consequences.
Relationships: Elena Kuragina/Isabel (Issa) Banquo/Audrey Rose Red Riverdale-Kuragin (implied), Lucy Ishmael Ganymede/Dieke Helena Pelides, Lucy Ishmael Ganymede/Elena Vasilyevna Kuragina (Homoerotic Misogyny) (implied), Lucy Ishmael Ganymede/June Gabler, Theo Pendragon/Orlando Theodore Tim (mentioned)
Series: press f to pay respects [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2206863
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	Forever

**FRIDAY, 10:23 PM**

The sound of a bottle falling on the floor startled Lucy out of her reverie. She jolted in her seat at the now-empty banquet table, her head flying sharply towards the sound. Out in the middle of the dance floor, Audrey had dropped a most-likely contraband bottle of champagne onto the floor, sending broken pieces scattering everywhere. Lucy watched May and Wren immediately drop to the floor to help pick up the pieces as Audrey stumbled, half-drunk already, into the arms of Elena and Issa.

Audrey’s scuffling feet sent the top of the bottle flying over towards Lucy. She picked it up and turned it over in her hands, considering it. The edge of the bottle was marked with faint lipstick marks, while only about two inches of the body were still intact - the rest was currently being swept into napkins by a couple frazzled students. One side had fractured into a pointed tip, the exposed glass glinting in the dim lighting. 

Tilting her head to the side, Lucy considered the bottle. Holding it, she felt more dangerous than she had in a while. More able to hold her own in this school of farce, of ridicule, of nasty tricks played behind backs.

Lucy tucked the broken bottle into her bag, picked up her glass, and took a large gulp of water.

**FRIDAY, 6PM**

“Ugh,” Lucy groaned, twisting around in front of the bathroom mirror to see her back. “This dress doesn’t even fit me anymore.” 

June popped in from the hall, her light blonde hair swept up in a fancy updo. “Have you seen my brush - oh. You good, Lucy?”

The shorter girl slumped forward, resting her hands on the edge of the sink. “I hate that we have to dress up all fancy for this stupid prom. I haven’t worn a nice dress since the eighth grade formal I was forced to go to.” She heaved another dramatic sigh.

June wrapped an arm around her shoulder and squeezed reassuringly. “It’ll be fine. I promise no one will care if your dress isn’t perfect.” 

Lucy smiled thinly. “Thank you,” she said, squeezing June’s hand. “I know it’ll be fine. I’m just overreacting. I’m a little…” she waved her hands around in the air. “I don’t know. All over the place. Things are just…” she trailed off.

June nodded sympathetically. “The end of the year is always stressful. Just know I’m here to listen or help.” With that, she picked up her brush from the edge of the bathroom counter and whirled out the door. 

Lucy looked at herself in the mirror, noticing her hands, which trembled slightly. She clenched them into fists, ran her fingers through her hair, then followed June out the door and back to their dorm room.

**LAST MONDAY, 3:05 PM**

Elena whisked into the club room, her disheveled tie nearly getting caught on the edge of the doorframe. “Hey, guys!” she sang out, dropping into the seat at the head of the classroom - Lucy’s typical seat. She stuck her legs up on the desk and started twirling her hair around her finger, humming slightly to herself.

The others regarded her curiously. “Is Lucy not coming today?” Orlando asked, cocking its head to the side. Next to him, Theo had their headphones in and twirled the string around their fingers absentmindedly. 

Elena shrugged. “Dunno.”

The club stared at her blankly. June looked especially concerned. Elena sighed, pulling her feet back to the floor. “She’s not here yet, so I may as well sit here. I should be vice president, anyway.”

“You’re not, though,” Issa pointed out from where she was lounging on the floor next to Max. “Junie and I outrank you.”

Elena rolled her eyes. “I think you’ll find that I was the original second-in-command, bitch.” They stood up, picked up a piece of chalk, and began scrawling “MEETING AGENDA” on the board.

Percy snickered, entertained, and Issa shot him a dirty look from across the room. “Shut it, ghost boy.” She sat up a bit straighter. “I happen to know Lucy is probably just running late from soccer practice.”

As if on cue, quick paces echoed through the hallway, and Lucy slid in the open doorway, her hair still askew and mildly sweaty. She dropped her backpack in the corner. “Hey, guys! Sorry I’m-” she stopped cold when she saw Elena at the board, her face falling into a scowl. “Elena,” she enunciated coldly. “What is this?”

Elena didn’t glance up from the board, where she had bullet-pointed “Lesbian Edmund” and “Romeo and Juliet Were In Love, Fuck You”. Lucy stormed over, reached up, and plucked the chalk from her hands. “Sit down,” Lucy said. Elena turned slowly and smirked.

“You can’t make me, Lucy. You can’t even control this club on a good day.” A quiet “Oooh” rustled through the attentive club as June shushed them.

Fuming, Lucy turned away from Elena and started to erase the board, stopping midway through so the title read “GENDA” She whirled around to look at Elena, who was lounging against the other half of the board, watching with a bored expression on her face. “You know what, Elena? If you want to run this club so badly, you can have it today. But don’t think I’ll forget this. I will never forgive you.”

With that dramatic statement, Lucy threw the chalk in Elena’s direction, scooped up her backpack, and stomped out the door. Her footsteps echoed down the hall before fading into nothing. 

The room was dead silent. Everyone looked around with a slightly guilty or confused expression on their face. Finally, Max spoke up.

“So… lesbian Edmund?” he ventured. The room erupted in soft laughs, and conversations struck up once again. 

  
  


**FRIDAY, 10:37 PM**

“Clone rights! Clone rights! Clone rights!” chanted a group of first-years watching Theo and Orlando simultaneously try to down full cups of ginger ale in one go. Theo spluttered and almost choked on his drink, and Dieke pounded him on the back vigorously. 

Lucy, still seated at the table, watched this with a slight smile on her face. The last week had been full of rising tensions and conflicts between club members, and she was glad that prom seemed to be bringing them closer together again.

Wren bounced over with a napkin full of bottle shards. “Lucy!” she greeted her, smiling. “Any shards get all the way over here? I’m trying to make sure no one steps or slips on any glass.” 

Shaking her head, Lucy stuck her hand in her bag, feeling to make sure the bottle head was still in there. A broken edge slit her left palm. She winced, but managed to say “Nope, nothing!” Wren looked at her curiously.

“Are you okay, Lucy? Why aren’t you with anyone? Did your date leave you?”

Lucy laughed quietly and shook her head. “No, Dieke’s just over there with Theorlando and the rest. I told her to go ahead. I’m just tired today.”

Wren pursed her lips sympathetically. “I feel you. Anyway, if you want to just hang out, I’ll be over there with Ava. We’re currently discussing repeating motifs in Supernatural.” Wren gestured to a table on the other side of the open dance floor, where Ava waved back at her. “See you!” Wren shifted the napkin of shards in her hand, dropped it in a nearby trashcan, and trotted back across the floor, dress flowing behind her.

Lucy sighed and put her head in her hands, marking her left cheek with a spot of blood from her cut. She hadn’t fully lied to Wren, but she hadn’t really told the truth either. She was not only tired; her head was spinning with thoughts of Elena’s mutiny, of the club’s willingness to simply not have Lucy be there at the meetings. 

_ You can’t even control this club on a good day. _

Lucy shoved her fists into her eyes even harder. Her cut stung, a reminder of every mistake that plagued her these days.

_ I will never forgive you. _

Had she been in the wrong? Had Elena? Or was there no wrong or right here, only a struggle for power that would inevitably end badly?

**LAST WEDNESDAY, 3:10 PM**

Lucy had decided to deliberately show up late to the Homoerotic Misogyny meeting that day. She trusted her friends - she did - but she also felt that they would not care were anyone else to be in charge of the club.

She tiptoed up to the window of the club that looked onto the hallway and peeked in. Through the grainy glass, she spotted Issa, Elena, and Audrey with control of the board, Elena and Audrey seemingly discussing Hélène while Issa doodled Goneril in the other corner. Macy egged Issa on while Wren occasionally interjected a point about Dolokhov into the Hélène conversation. The rest of the club was caught up in their own conversations. Tal was holding a copy of Kafka, and Emma scribbled in French in a notebook (with Zoe’s supervision, of course). Not a one of them seemed to notice or even care that Lucy wasn’t there.

Except for Dieke, that is, who was looking around with a slight frown on her face. Suddenly, her gaze lighted on the window and she locked eyes with Lucy. Lucy quickly put a finger to her lips. Glancing around nervously, Dieke mumbled “Using the bathroom” and scurried out the door. 

“Lucy! What - “

“Shhh,” Lucy counseled her, putting a finger over her lips while dragging her into an empty classroom across the hall. “Don’t let them know I came.”

Dieke looked puzzled. “Why not? They’re gonna be wondering where you are.”

Lucy shook her head slowly, gravely. “I don’t think so.” A tear wobbled in the corner of her eye. “I - They - .” She squeezed her eyes shut. “Nevermind. I just can’t be there today.”

Dieke paused, but then nodded. “Okay,” they said. Lucy offered them a tearful smile. “If anyone asks, I’ll say you had too much work.”

Lucy clasped her hands. “Thank you, Dieke.” she whispered. The two stood up and Dieke went to go before Lucy stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. “Wait. Dieke.” She gulped. “Would you.. um. Would you mind going to prom with me?” Dieke was silent, and Lucy grimaced. “As a friend, of course, I just need someone, and as far as I know you don’t have a date, so - “

“Sure,” Dieke said cheerfully. Lucy exhaled a sigh of relief. “I’ll see you outside the Great Hall on Friday, then?”

“Yes,” Lucy said gratefully, and smiled as Dieke returned to the club meeting.

**FRIDAY, 10:55 PM**

“Hey, Lucy!” Dieke said, coming over to the table where the former was scrolling mindlessly through her Instagram. “Come dance!” 

Lucy smiled up at her. “Be there in a second.” Dieke nodded and bounced away to join the Slutrio on the dance floor. The speakers were blaring “How Bad Can I Be,” probably per Damian or Max’s request, and half the students could not stop laughing long enough to truly dance.

Lucy slid her phone into her bag and was about to leave it on the table before a shot of paranoia ran down her spine. What if someone decided to go through it and noticed the slightly bloody bottle piece in it? What would they think? Huffing a sigh, she picked up the bag and slung it over her shoulder, heading out to the dance floor.

After about ten minutes of bouncing around awkwardly, exchanging out-of-character smiles with the Slutrio, and singing along to The Lorax, Lucy was starting to tire of all the social interaction. She shifted in her Converse, suddenly feeling wildly underdressed.

The current song faded out, and CHVRCHES’ “Forever” started playing. Dieke smiled and nudged Lucy with her shoulder. “Hey, don’t you love this song?”

Lucy grinned back. “I suppose I do.” The two gazed deeply into each other’s eyes for a moment before Lucy caught a glimpse of Elena shooting her a glare and stalking off towards the bathrooms. Lucy inhaled sharply. “Dee, I’m really sorry, but I… have to use the bathroom. I’ll be back in a minute.”

Dieke watched in confusion as Lucy speedwalked out of the hall and after Elena, her Converse slapping the stone floor comedically and her bag looking rather bulky.

**THURSDAY, 7:56 AM**

“I don’t know,” Issa whispered to Elena as they waited for history class to start. “I think Lucy’s great, I love the kid, but she also overreacted with you, and it seems a little - I don’t know - immature to just ditch the club completely.”

Elena shrugged. “Whatever. We’re friends. It’ll be fine.”

Issa eyed her suspiciously. “One day you’re going to have to actually care about something, Lena.”

On Issa’s other side, Audrey snorted. “What’s the fun in that? I think we should all just go around doing things without thinking of the consequences.”

Issa glared at her. “Of course you do, Miss Kuragincest. Shut up.”

From a few seats away, Lucy stared down at her paper, eyes burning. She had heard every word.

**FRIDAY, 11:07 PM**

“Elena,” Lucy said, catching the bathroom door as the other person tried to slam it behind her. “We need to talk.”

Elena scoffed. “Sure. So talk.”

Lucy gulped, letting the door close and following Elena into the main area of the bathroom. She settled against the counter, Elena facing her with her back to a stall. An uncomfortable silence pervaded the atmosphere as Elena picked at her nails and Lucy scuffed her feet. 

“Why did you… I don’t know how… why did you undermine my authority?” Lucy ventured. Elena’s face became a peculiar shape.

“ _ Undermine your authority?  _ What are you, a dictator?” she said, on the verge of letting go a laugh.

“No, it’s just… I feel like you all are drifting farther away from me. Like I’m on the outside. And I don’t see any other cause for that besides you.”

Elena shook her head disdainfully. “I’m not doing anything deliberately, Lucy. I was just messing around while you weren’t there.”

Lucy’s face contorted. “Well, whatever you  _ weren’t doing  _ is working,” she choked out, looking like she was about to cry. “I feel so… alone… like even this community I created doesn’t want me there.” Mindlessly, she reached into her bag and pulled out the top of the bottle. Turning it around in her hands, she said “I don’t belong anywhere anymore, you know?” The bottle smeared around the already half-dried blood that covered her left palm from the earlier cut, and she shifted it to her right hand. 

Elena just looked at her quietly. 

Lucy wouldn’t look up, just spun the mouth of the bottle around and around in her hands, seemingly unable to stop.  _ Whir.  _ Once around. A pause.  _ Whir.  _ Twice around. Another. Methodically, Lucy kept spinning the bottle, spinning the bottle, spinning the bottle. A tear traced its way down her cheek, and she wiped it off, smudging the blood on her cheek all the way across to her ear.

“Listen, Lucy, it’s all in good fun,” Elena began. Lucy jolted to attention and took three menacing steps towards her, gesturing wildly with the bottle. 

“It may be for you, but it’s not good fun for me! Why don’t you just let things stay the way they are, you jealous, power-hungry bitch!” Frustrated, Lucy slammed the broken bottle towards the wall - but, unfortunately, her depth perception was off. 

Elena gasped softly as the pointed edge of the bottle entered her chest just above her heart, a trickle of blood starting to make its way out. 

Lucy’s mouth dropped open and she tried to retract her hand, the bottle falling onto the floor with a muffled clang. Her eyes welled up with tears as she began to breathe heavily.

“Elena, Elena,” she repeated, holding them up as they began to slip to the floor, grimacing in pain. “I didn’t mean - I didn’t - I - you, you, you. It wasn’t meant to be this way!” she cried out finally.

Elena huffed quietly. “Who’s the bitch now, huh?” A trickle of blood ran out of her mouth, and Lucy stared at it, horrified. 

“Elena, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, please - I - “

Elena laughed. “Don’t apologize. I’m glad you finally grew a spine. Although I would’ve appreciated it if you hadn’t used it to - ow - to kill me.”

“You’re not dead!” Lucy insisted. “You’re not dead. You’re not dying.” Elena smiled crookedly, sliding out of Lucy’s hands and down to the floor. “You’re not.”

“You can’t erase the past,” Elena said. “You can’t repeat this moment, either. But you can get out.”

“What?” Lucy said, still in shock. 

“Get. Out.”

“What - “

“Take the bottle and leave. Now.”

“But why -”

“You don’t deserve to take the fall for this, Lucy.”

There was another long pause. 

Without saying another word, Lucy picked up the bottle from the floor, wrapping it in a paper towel and shoving it back in her bag.

“Elena, for what it’s worth, I- “ she stopped herself. “I’m sorry.”

Elena arched one last eyebrow at her. “You said that already, bitch. Go.”

Lucy nodded and walked out the door, sparing only one glance back.

**NINE MONTHS EARLIER**

Lucy arrived at Atrox Academy on a snowy Tuesday, her one hoodie not doing much to protect her from the cold. As she lugged her bags into the main hall and tried to find her room assignment, she bumped into a slightly taller girl with curly hair. “Oh - sorry!” she said.

The other turned. “S’fine. I’m Elena,” she said, extending her hand. 

“Lucy.”

“Ah!” Elena said with a faint smile. “My roommate!”

Lucy smiled nervously, a bit intimidated. “Yes… yeah, I suppose so. Hi.”

Elena looked at her, pursed her lips, then proclaimed “I think we’re going to get along just fine.” With that, she walked away, presumably towards their room.

**FRIDAY, 11:17 PM**

_ We’re going to get along just fine,  _ echoed the voice in Lucy’s head.  _ I’m Elena.  _

Did becoming friends, then joking rivals, then accidentally killing Elena count as “getting along just fine”? Lucy didn’t think so. Her palms sweated and her breath raced- she had no idea how she was going to act normal. Maybe the best thing was to just turn herself in, admit it was an accident, and go to prison. Prison wasn’t that big of a deal, right?

What was she saying? Prison wasn’t that big of a deal? Going to prison would ruin her life forever. And Elena had wanted her to leave, to not assume responsibility.

Lost in thought, Lucy wandered onto the open dance floor, blood smeared on her face, mind clearly in another place. Luckily, the other students were engrossed in dancing to “Never Gonna Give You Up”, and only Dieke spotted Lucy looking lost and devastated. She scurried over and grabbed her by the arm, spinning her around so her bloody face was facing the exit. “Lucy! What happened?” She ran her finger over Lucy’s cheek, collecting blood on it. “Wait. Where’s Elena?”

Lucy shook her head, on the verge of tears once again. 

“LUCY! Where’s Elena?” Dieke looked like she’d just seen a ghost - and not just Percy.

“The… the bathroom,” Lucy whispered, and Dieke started to pull her towards it. “No! No, I can’t go back in there.”

Dieke’s eyes widened even further (if that was even possible) as they dragged Lucy down the hall and out the door into the courtyard. It was a crisp, clear night, and the stars twinkled down from above.

Lucy had grown accustomed to the stars always being there for her; now, as she shivered in the night air, they seemed to be passing judgement, sentencing her for a crime she’d never meant to commit.

“Lucy, what happened?” Dieke demanded. Lucy began to shake. Sighing, Dieke hugged her. “You can tell me. It’s okay,” she whispered, rubbing her back.

Lucy choked on a sob. “I was arguing with Elena about the club leadership thing,” she said, her voice strangled, “and I pulled out this broken piece of bottle and I was playing with it in my hands because I was nervous and then I got angry and I swear I didn’t mean to but I hit her - I - the bottle, it-” she dissolved into sobs. “I didn’t mean to, Dee, I swear I didn’t!”

“Shhhh,” Dieke consoled her. “Shh. I know. I know.” Mind racing, she gulped. “Is she… dead?”

Lucy shrugged. “She wasn’t when I left. She probably is now. Elena told me to leave, to not get caught, to-” her voice caught in her throat.

“Okay,” Dieke said, disentangling herself from Lucy’s arms. “Then you won’t get caught.”

Lucy blinked at her, not quite understanding. “What? How?”

“I don’t know, but I will not let you get caught.  _ No one  _ is going to let you take the fall for this. Everyone knows you would never want to kill anyone.”

_ But for a moment, I did,  _ Lucy admitted to herself.  _ For a moment, I…  _ she pushed the thought away, sniffling. “Thank you, Dieke.”

“Now let’s go back inside,” Dieke said, tugging on Lucy’s arm once again. “You’re going to go into the boy’s bathroom, wash off your face, make sure you still have the bottle, and meet me back out here. I’ll get the rest of Homoerotic Misogyny, and we’ll figure it out.” Lucy stared at the ground blankly. “Okay?”

Lucy looked up and faked a smile. “Okay,” she said, and the two headed back into the hall.

**SATURDAY, 2AM**

That night, Lucy cried herself to sleep.

That night, the rest of the club sat up, unable to sleep, one sentence running through their heads over and over:  _ I didn’t notice anything. _

That night, the broken bottle rested at the bottom of the nearby lake, tossed in haphazardly after passing through the hands of a couple dozen friends.

That night, Elena’s body was found by the janitorial staff as they were cleaning the hall up after prom. 

After that night, nothing was ever the same again.

**SATURDAY, 7AM**

The next morning, when the principal told the school that one of their students - Elena Kuragina - had been found dead, her ex-roomate Lucy Ishmael Ganymede burst into tears once more.


End file.
